


Not a Word of This to Anyone! (Or: A Ticklish Spa Day)

by Twinklysmiles



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies), Star Trek: The Original Series, Star Trek: The Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Dammit Jim, Gen, Massage, McKirk - but only at a stretch, Pedicure, Spa Treatments, Tickling, Ticklish Leonard "Bones" McCoy, shore leave tickles, ticklish, ticklish Jim Kirk
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-15
Updated: 2021-03-15
Packaged: 2021-03-23 18:08:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30059490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Twinklysmiles/pseuds/Twinklysmiles
Summary: Kirk and McCoy get roped into joining their friends on a spa day, which turns out to be a rather ticklish experience. They seriously regret their decision as they helplessly suffer through a pedicure and a full body massage.Or: The one where Jim and Leonard are just too damn ticklish, and Uhura and Chapel are having a lot of fun watching.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 5





	Not a Word of This to Anyone! (Or: A Ticklish Spa Day)

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by this gif from the TOS episode "Shore Leave":  
> https://twinklysmiles.tumblr.com/post/645724626317639680/spa-day-part-1-pedicure 
> 
> Although I can actually picture AOS Kirk and McCoy even better in this one.

“So, what are you up to today, girls?” Kirk asked Uhura and Chapel over breakfast in the luxurious hotel most of his crew had booked into for shore leave on this amazing recreation planet’s gorgeous “Earth Island”, a resort specifically designed to cater to human tastes and needs. They had certainly earned some real R&R after what they’d been through recently.

“Oh, we’re treating ourselves to a long overdue spa day, aren’t we?” Uhura beamed, glancing at Chapel and sighing contentedly. “Want to join us?”

“Where’s Spock?” McCoy cut in quickly, hoping to distract Kirk before he started to seriously consider Uhura’s suggestion. “Is he skipping breakfast today? I haven’t seen him yet.”

Knowing Jim, the doctor was afraid that the captain might actually take Uhura up on her offer, and he really didn’t want to have a spa day. The thought of having his body touched and prodded for a whole day made him uneasy. He was … sensitive.

“Spock, Scotty and Pavel already left for a conference on warp engineering or whatever,” Uhura replied, rolling her eyes at the idea of wasting precious shore leave time on something like that.

To McCoy’s regret, however, Chapel took up the spa day subject again.

“So, what’s your answer, Captain? Doctor? Are you coming with us? Treat yourselves to some pampering, too?”

“I don’t think that’s for us,” McCoy muttered, casting Kirk a glance that clearly said, ‘Don’t even think about it!’ Which, of course, only served to pique the captain’s interest even more.

“Don’t be a spoilsport, Bones!” he exclaimed, giving McCoy his broadest grin. “I think that’s a splendid idea! We should definitely try it!”

“Oh, come on, Doctor,” Chapel chimed in. “You, of all people, seriously need to relax!”

“And I will,” McCoy insisted, “just not at a spa!”

“You’re not turning into a macho man, are you, Leonard?” Uhura teased, and the doctor knew that she had him. He just couldn't let her get away with an accusation like this.

“All right,” he grudgingly agreed, “maybe for a couple of hours. What are you starting with?”

“A pedicure,” Chapel smiled. “They’re so relaxing!”

“A pedicure?” McCoy gulped, sounding almost as horror-stricken as he felt. “How on earth can that be relaxing? I couldn't handle a pedicure, I’m far too…”

He broke off midsentence, catching himself just in time before giving away too much.

‘Ticklish!’ Chapel thought gleefully, silently completing the sentence.

That was why she’d suggested the pedicure in the first place. As a nurse, she knew a lot of intimate details about the crew members of the Enterprise, like people’s various tickle spots, for example, most of which were inevitably brought to light during physical exams. If a crew member was ticklish, Chapel probably knew it. And where, too. And she absolutely loved to exploit that knowledge a little, although no one would suspect.

McCoy, for example, was more than a little ticklish on the soles of his feet, as she’d found out when he’d sprained his ankle a while ago. Especially on his heels and the balls of his feet, which practically screamed for a little pedicure fun.

Chapel also knew that Kirk was seriously ticklish. He was incredibly sensitive on his belly. To the extent that she had to pin him down, his fingers desperately digging into her arms, whenever Dr. McCoy had to check his abdomen. She had no idea about the sensitivity of his feet, though. But she’d certainly like to find out.

“Well, let’s go!” Kirk threw his napkin on the table and got up. “Time’s a wastin’! There’s only so much shore leave left!”

McCoy shook his head at his friend’s enthusiasm, debating whether it was still possible for him to chicken out. But when he looked at the women’s challenging faces, he knew there was no way they’d ever let him live it down if he did. How he was supposed to live through a pedicure, however, he wasn’t so sure, either.

‘Dammit, I’ll somehow survive it,’ he thought, trying to convince himself. After all, a lot of people got pedicures, and a lot of people were ticklish. Especially on their feet. Although maybe not as acutely as he was. He suppressed a shudder.

Besides, just like physicians, pedicurists were bound to be trained in how not to tickle, weren’t they? As a doctor, and being excruciatingly ticklish himself, he was always careful to make his touch as little ticklish as possible, always very attentive to any tell-tale reactions, and trying not to tickle his patients more than necessary.

‘Not so, Christine’, he thought wryly. Over the years, working with her, he’d almost got the impression that she actually enjoyed tickling patients, and rather liked to exploit tickle spots when she found them. He’d even wanted to talk to her about it several times, but found the issue too embarrassing. Too close to home. So, he’d contented himself with trying to keep her away from the more ticklish patients, at least the ones he knew of. Like Jim or Chekov.

* * *

Uhura and Chapel enjoyed themselves immensely, watching their friends having their pedicures. Like a lot of men, Jim and Leonard were clearly not used to having their feet touched, both of them quite obviously finding the procedure terribly ticklish, although dealing with it very differently.

While Kirk was just giggling away unashamedly, enjoying a good laugh and warning his pedicurist that he couldn't be held responsible for his reflexes and possible resulting injuries, if it tickled too much, as well as telling her that he didn’t think he could last all the way to the end, McCoy desperately tried to hide his growing distress, clearly deeply embarrassed about his ticklishness.

But Chapel guessed that his feet were way more ticklish than Kirk’s, and was pretty sure that he’d soon lose the fight. His lips pressed tightly together, his expression almost comically rigid, tears starting to spill from his eyes, he was a picture of ticklish agony.

No matter how hard he tried, the doctor couldn't hide what a harrowing ordeal this was for him. His spasming body treacherously betraying how the pedicurist’s ticklish touches were killing him. And she hadn’t even started on the serious scraping and scratching part, or used her super-weapon, the rotating pumice stone, yet.

Gripping the armrests of his chair so hard, his knuckles went completely white, McCoy did his best to keep a straight face and not show how unbearably it tickled. But the pedicurist, of course, immediately noticed his predicament and, exchanging a mischievous glance with her colleague working on Kirk’s feet, made her touches extra ticklish until the doctor finally burst out laughing and just couldn't stop again.

By the time the two pedicurists were done with their respective ‘victims’ first foot, the two Starfleet officers were a ticklish mess. Even Kirk’s laughter seemed forced now, and poor McCoy had nearly fallen off his chair several times, what with all his writhing and bucking.

And while the captain had issued a continuous, if incoherent stream of half-hearted pleas for mercy, which he’d seemed to get more serious about when his pedicurist had started to work his soles over with her spinning pumice stone, the doctor had been helpless to get a single word out from the moment he’d first erupted with laughter.

McCoy had been bouncing up and down in his seat like mad, shaking his head from side to side, holding on to the armrests for dear life, and visibly just hanging on by a thread, trying to somehow get through this excruciatingly ticklish ordeal.

Chapel couldn't tear her eyes away, mesmerised by how incredibly ticklish the doctor’s feet really were, and even Uhura was clearly enjoying the show.

Kirk regained his breath shortly after his pedicurist had finished his first foot, but it took McCoy almost a minute to calm down and stop giggling.

* * *

“Enough,” the doctor finally gasped, “one foot is enough for life.”

“Oh, don’t be an infant!” Chapel and Uhura said almost at the same time, then looked at each other and burst out laughing while McCoy gave them his best scowl.

“I’ve had more ticklish patients, believe me,” his pedicurist said, grinning widely, and McCoy blushed furiously, hating to have his embarrassing ticklishness so bluntly addressed. Then she cheekily added, “At least I didn’t have to strap you down!”, the mere idea almost giving the doctor a heart attack. “But usually,” she continued with a reassuring smile that could or could not have been sincere, “once you’ve made it through your first foot, the second one isn’t so bad anymore. Your feet just need some time to get used to the sensation.”

McCoy was just about to politely decline, much rather enduring Uhura’s and Chapel’s eternal teasing than going through such atrocious tickling again, when Kirk challenged him, “Come on, Bones, you’re tougher than that! If I can take it, so can you. Besides, we haven’t laughed nearly enough lately. And you always say “laughter is the best medicine”, don’t you?”

“I never say that,” the doctor grumbled, but when he saw three pairs of eyes wickedly smirking at him, he put his second foot back up on the footrest with a sigh. So, his friends had discovered his greatest, most shameful weakness. He’d show them that he could take this like a man.

Only he couldn't. Not even for a second. He regretted his foolish decision the moment the pedicurist put her first tickle tool to use on his sensitive sole, causing him to instantly double over and dissolve into uncontrollable laughter once more.

The sensation was so unbearably ticklish, he couldn't even beg her to stop again, the air being forced out of his lungs as he helplessly fell into silent laughter. It most certainly didn’t tickle any less than it had on the other foot. In fact, it seemed to tickle even worse. Pure, unadulterated tickle hell.

Just the pedicurist’s grip on his toes, as she trimmed and filed his nails, was insanely ticklish, but the torture multiplied, when she started scraping his calloused heels, and again, when she set to work on the horrendously sensitive balls of his feet. He wriggled around in his chair, covering his face with his hands and laughing harder than he could ever remember.

McCoy vaguely noticed Kirk howling with laughter next to him, too, but his considerations whether or not Jim’s other foot also seemed to be more ticklish, were cruelly cut short when his pedicurist turned on this diabolical pumice device, clearly invented by the devil himself with the sole purpose to tickle him to death.

Suffering through the longest, and certainly most humiliating minutes of his life, he didn’t even care what a ridiculous and sorry sight he must be anymore. All he cared about was for this horrendously ticklish nightmare to finally be over.

One might almost think the pedicurist was prolonging his ordeal on purpose, but then again, she might just be doing her job, without any intention to torture him. After all, his feet had always been unspeakably ticklish. Definitely his second most ticklish spot.

* * *

Watching the men writhe and wriggle, doubled up with laughter over a simple pedicure, was greatly entertaining for Uhura and Chapel. And when Uhura asked her friend in a whisper, “Do you think they’re tickling them deliberately?” the nurse just nodded with a huge grin on her face.

They certainly were. Not only were they still going strong, while the women’s feet were long finished, but even though Chapel knew that McCoy’s feet were horribly ticklish, and had anticipated the spinning pumice stones to seriously torment him, this was way more intense than your average pedicure.

She almost pitied Kirk and the doctor. Almost. It was just too much fun to see the strong and proud men being tickled out of their minds. For a tickle fiend like Chapel, this was almost too good to be true. But Uhura didn’t seem to mind too much, either, Christine thought wryly. But then, of course, it was “only tickling”, right?

When the men’s ordeal was finally over, and they slowly recovered, wiping the tears off their faces, McCoy taking considerably longer to regain his breath and his composure than Kirk, Chapel couldn't help feeling a little disappointed that the fun was over again already. Therefore, the pedicurists’ unexpected next words totally made her day.

“You poor guys!” McCoy’s pedicurist sweetly smiled at both men, the sympathy on her face appearing almost genuine. “You really have it bad, don’t you? To make up for all the suffering you’ve just gone through, we’d like to offer you a full body massage at half-price, if you’re interested.”

Kirk and McCoy immediately declined, clearly just wanting to get the hell out of this torture chamber, hopping off their chairs as soon as their tormentors released their feet, and hastily putting on their socks and shoes. But when one of the pedicurists grinned and gave Chapel and Uhura a mischievous wink, the two women instantly got the message and started talking their friends into accepting the offer.

“This is one of the most famous spas in the whole galaxy!” Uhura gushed. “You’re so lucky!”

“She’s right, Doctor! Captain?” Chapel agreed. “They’re always fully booked. People pay good money to even get a spot, and you’re being offered one right away. And at a 50% discount, too! You’d be crazy not to take it!”

* * *

“Thanks, but no, thanks,” McCoy croaked, his voice still hoarse from shrieking with laughter, a panicked look creeping onto his face, as he recognised all the signs of Kirk actually contemplating the offer.

“Well, I could certainly use a good, relaxing massage now,” the captain smiled at his pretty pedicurist. “Come on, Bones! You’ve been pretty tense, too, lately!”

Of course, Jim would fall for a lovely face and a suggestive smile, the doctor thought angrily. And maybe he should. Just because McCoy was too damn ticklish, why shouldn’t his friend enjoy a good massage?

“I’ll pass,” he said, trying to sound amiably despite his feet still tingling and twitching irritatingly. “You just go ahead, and I’ll find something else to do today.”

“Oh, come on, Bones, give it a chance!” the captain all but whined, “Just one little massage, and then we’ll do whatever you want for the rest of the day.”

McCoy heaved a sigh. Who could resist Jim’s puppy dog eyes? And when Chapel smirked at him and suggested, “You could always ask for your feet to be excluded!” it became a matter of pride. This was ridiculous. Surely, he could get a massage without being tickled half to death!

And practically already feeling the soothing effects of strong hands kneading the muscles in his tight neck and back, he grudgingly nodded and followed Kirk and the two pedicurists across the beautifully kept lawn of the resort to the massage parlour. 

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer:  
> I own nothing of Star Trek.


End file.
